The Aussie

Before I went on vacation at the end of the summer, I decided to get some lash extensions. I’ve had them in the past and love them. They really brighten up your face and add a little something special, even when you’re not wearing any makeup. For anyone who has never had them, or doesn’t know what they entail, let me tell you about them. You lay on a bed for an hour or more, and the lash technician puts a sticky bandage type thing underneath your eyes. It doesn’t hurt, but it’s a little uncomfortable if they don’t get it quite right because it can pull at your bottom lashes and skin. Don’t be afraid to tell them if it’s too uncomfortable. Then they glue lashes onto your own individual lashes. My eyes are a little sensitive and the glue irritates them a bit, but beauty is pain, right? RIGHT? The finished product is worth it, but you do have to take care of them. Try not to get them wet, don’t use oil-based makeup removers, if you feel like you need to use mascara, don’t use waterproof mascara and only use it on the tips, don’t rub your eyes, don’t pull on them, try not to sleep on them, don’t use eyelash curlers, and make sure you brush them out. Ok, so I know that sounds like a pain in the ass, and it is, but whatever. Still worth it. If you take care of them, they’ll last 3-4 weeks before you feel like you really need a fill. The lashes will fall out with your own natural lashes, but will obviously go sooner if you’re rough with them. When I had them done before my trip to Jamaica a few years ago, being in the pool and ocean all week meant they didn’t last as long as I was used to. So anyways, I decided to get them before going on vacation.
I was at a wedding in Wenatchee, Washington and a friend and myself drove back, up through BC and Alberta on our way back to Saskatchewan. We stopped for a couple of nights in Kelowna. Now, I had been on Tinder for most of the trip, checking out what Washington had to offer and had talked to a few men. None of them really interested me much though. I found the same thing when we got to Kelowna. There were some good looking men there, but none sparked my interest too much. There were a couple I talked to a decent amount (as much as you can in 24 hours lol), but they both got super intense. The one still messages me now that I’m home, even though we never met, and wants to come visit me. The other one hasn’t messaged me for a bit now, but he was really into the idea of waking up next to me and spending a day with me. I was not into that. But I did find someone that I WAS into. I can’t say for sure what it was about him. Maybe it was how he made me laugh, or maybe it was his Australian accent, or maybe it was the walking tour of a distillery and two craft breweries I’d done that afternoon. Whatever it was, we had chemistry and he asked if I wanted to have a drink. He said he had a bottle of wine that was begging to be tasted (funnily enough, that wine and I had a lot in common). I told him I was travelling with a friend and that maybe we should go to his place. The problem with that? His place is a van. Stop laughing. He’s an urban planner in Australia, but he really loves BC. So he works in Australia and then takes time off to travel through BC. To do that, he bought a van that he drives around, and sometimes sleeps in when he’s not couch surfing with friends. So I asked my friend if he would mind doing some site-seeing in Kelowna by himself for a couple of hours. He was happy to do so. He’s no clam-jammer!

Aussie comes over with a lovely bottle of wine and tells me about his life, asks me questions, and is a genuinely nice guy. We drink the bottle and he puts the moves on. I love a great makeout and he did not disappoint. He really loved my hair too, everything from the colour to how long and thick it is and he couldn’t stop touching it. His dick was uncut, but I’m not that fussy about it, as long as it’s clean. Wine and dick cheese is not my idea of a good time. He was really concerned about me getting off, which was awesome. He worked really hard at it, figuring out what I liked and listening to my directions. He had a move I’ve never really experienced before too. When he first started doing it, I was laying there thinking, who gave this guy his medical degree? Am I due for a pap already? Is this guy checking on my ovaries? But then I quickly got on board with what he was doing. While he used one hand to slip a couple fingers in and massage my g-spot, he use the other hand to push down on my lower belly. The extra pressure from both sides on my g-spot was incredible! I lended my own hand to the cause it wasn’t long before our teamwork paid off and I was a happy girl. He was rock fucking hard up until he put on the condom. Then, not so much. But, like I said, I’m a team player, and, eager to repay all his hard work, I gave him a blow job. He kneeled in front of me and as he got closer to cumming, he put his hands in my hair and started pulling my head in closer to him. Every time I’d come in after the back swing, I could feel my eyelashes hitting his pelvis and all I could think was, “OMG MY LASHES!!!” I mean, they were only a week old! Hurry the fuck up, amiright ladies?!

He came, my lashes were mostly intact, we made out some more, and he texted to make sure I made it home from BC. Thanks, Aussie.

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