Army Dan Tries For a Second Tour

Read this about Army Dan before continuing on.

I haven’t seen or heard from Army Dan in a few years now. I didn’t even recognize him when I browsed his profile on POF in recent weeks. Last night, he sent me a message. He informed me that we had hung out in the past. Since I didn’t recognize him, I asked him for a few details and his name and then it all clicked in who he was. We exchanged a few messages and then he asked if I wanted to “hang out” sometime. I told him that I’m not 25 anymore and if he asked me out for a drink, that is something I might respond to. He said, “No I’m not really looking to date anyone on this site to be honest , I’ve dated a few train wrecks and I’ve had enough just killing time maybe smash a few randoms. Sorry Hun good luck.” It was nice of him to squash any doubt I may have had about seeing him again. I told him that going on a date doesn’t mean it needs to lead somewhere serious. He said he just got out of a relationship and wasn’t really up for it.

When did men get so fucking lazy? It’s been a really long time since I’ve met anyone with any actual game. After re-reading my experiences with Dan the first time around, I am definitely not interested in seeing him again. BUT, he doesn’t know that. It would have taken minimal effort on his part to ask me out for a drink where he could have tried to charm his way into my pants. Seriously, it’s not like I suggested we start dating, and it’s somewhat offensive that’s the leap he made. I’m a fucking lady and deserve to be wined and dined, or at lease wined, before you pull your dick out! This isn’t to say that I will react like this in every situation, I reserve the right to take my pants off at any time. However, just put in some goddamn effort already! It only makes the rewards that much better. Maybe that’s why he keeps dating train wrecks. I wish I could send a warning to these randoms he hopes to smash and warn them that if his fucking is anything like his kissing, it’s going to be hard, aggressive, wet, and his tongue will be everywhere. Wait. That doesn’t sound too bad. Perhaps I’ve made an error in judgement…

Naw. He probably fucks like a sad monkey on acid. I made the right choice.

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